A Tale of Two Treadmills

This story could happen in any town. In fact, if you're a gym novice you've probably encountered this. I'm not going to label this as a horror story but my internal monologue was just that dramatic when it happened.

It all happened a couple days ago in our building's gym.

Husband and I showed up and after a little go on the elliptical machine I decided to hop on the treadmill. Here's something you need to know:

I am terrified of running on the treadmill.

I can get it up to 3.5 mph before I feel like I'm going to miss a step and fly into the stationary bikes behind me. My goal is to learn how to run on a treadmill which is apparently the easiest thing to do because everyone in our gym seems to be able to do it. 

Joyful treadmill runners. WTH? (allposters.com)

Treadmill running happens on the regular so it wasn't a big surprise. What DID happen was this...

I hop on the treadmill and see the machine next to me is covered in stuff. So much stuff that one might think the person using the machine is living there. This person had arm and leg weights, a water bottle, an iPod with headphones, towels, and etc small items I couldn't see. This individual was nowhere to be found.

I start going my usual 3.5 mph on a slight incline and I'm watching tv when all of the sudden, GYM BRUNETTE BARBIE comes strolling out of the sauna and gets on the machine next to me.

WHAT. THE. HECK. 

Not only did her outfit look perfect like she was dressed by the editors of Shape Magazine there was not a hair out of place. She just got out of the sauna barely sweating with perfect makeup. She looked like she was in her mid-to-late 40s but had definitely had work done on her face and maracas. I can't fault her for that because who in this town hasn't had work done? That's like pointing out she had arms. But more importantly, WHO IS THIS ALIEN?

I looked down at my ensemble.

I was wearing one of four pairs of yoga pants I own and one of Husband's oversized shirts. My hair had the just electrocuted and thrown in a rubber band look and no, I was not wearing any makeup and I was not "glistening."

To make matters worse, this older lady dressed to perfection puts on the arm and leg weights and starts RUNNING on the treadmill at a ridiculous incline.

If someone had taken a picture of that moment it would have been the most amazingly hilarious compare and contrast picture of all times.

The point of this whole post is that somewhere between the feelings I had of utter confusion and total embarrassment I realized something: 

This lady works hard.

Maybe she could run on the treadmill the day she started at the gym. Maybe she wears a wig and that's why her hair is so perfect. Maybe she is just naturally athletic and this is second nature to her. But she is working at it. I don't think I could ever be where that woman is, but I got up and walked down the hall to the gym after going through the effort of picking the perfect oversized t-shirt out of Husband's drawer. Truth be told, when she started sprinting uphill next to me I felt a little braver and I pushed the button and went up to 3.6 mph.

Maybe one day I will run on the treadmill. I mean I guess it should be on a goal list somewhere. 

That and "never sweating."  How did she do that?!!?!